Kamaria Wilburn (Photo by Jay Paul)
Kamaria Wilburn will never forget hearing her foster parents talk about their motivations.
“I’d listen to them literally sit down in front of us and talk about, ‘This is for the money. We don’t like them, but we need them here.’ That does something bad to an 11-year-old child,” she says. “I really wanted a family. … It kind of took [away] a piece of me.”
Growing up in foster care, Wilburn developed strong opinions about what was wrong with the system. Foster parents should have to account for how they spend the stipends they receive from the state, she says. And every foster child should have an advocate — not just a social worker, but someone who will listen to their concerns and defend them.
“I waited my whole life, [wondering,] would these things ever get addressed?” she says. Now at age 18, she’s getting the chance to speak to state legislators and ask for change.
She’s one of 13 young people with experience in Virginia foster or kinship care who are speaking to legislators during Uplifting Young Voices: Foster and Kinship Care Virtual Advocacy Day.
This day, on Jan. 27, is organized by nonprofit Voices for Virginia’s Children. “One of our philosophies is, ‘Nothing about us without us,’ ” explains Allison Gilbreath, Voices’ policy and program director. When the organization is considering its legislative priorities, she says, it’s important to ask those who grew up in foster care, “Is this really what is best, or is this what professionals think is best?”
The young advocates are paid for their training and for the time they spend on advocacy work. Each participant will speak to as many as 10 legislators via Zoom.
“The most important thing that we teach them is how their voice matters, and how their voice is different from what legislators are used to hearing,” Gilbreath says. Even a year after the first advocacy day, legislators still remember hearing former foster kids’ stories.
Voices has three legislative priorities related to foster care this year.
One is asking the state to invest more money in prevention services for kids and families. Gilbreath forecasts “a perfect storm” for the foster care system in the latter days of the COVID-19 epidemic. Families’ financial hardships mean they have trouble caring for their children, leading to more children being placed in the system. The return to school means that previously unseen neglect and abuse will be reported. Parents’ unheard cry, she says, is, “Can you help me, instead of [taking] my child away?”
Two is eliminating barriers to kinship care, where children are placed with relatives. In Virginia, just 6% of children who need homes are taken in by extended family. The national average is 32%. Raising that number requires the state to remove bureaucratic obstacles and provide social supports such as case management. The state just began offering financial assistance to kinship caregivers in November.
Three is simply helping youth in foster care have normal adolescent experiences, such as getting a driver’s license. Subsidizing their car insurance, for example, can make it possible for a young person to get a job, go to college and build independence.
Brianna Scott, 21, decided to become an advocate “because when I was in foster care I was going through a lot, and I would have loved if somebody had my back.” When she experienced abuse in one home, no one did anything until a summer camp counselor saw her scars and welts and contacted social services, she says. That’s when a Dinwiddie County social worker came to get her and her sisters, then found a family that could take all three siblings.
Brianna Scott (Photo by Jay Paul)
Often, social workers don’t listen, she says. They take a foster parent’s word over a child’s. Scott would like to see specialists who pay attention to signs of abuse and have the power to intercede.
Now working as a certified nursing assistant, Scott hopes to continue her public speaking and advocacy work. “I just want to see better happen for these kids in foster care.”
In March 2020, the state created an Office of Children Ombudsman to advocate for youth in foster care. However, Gilbreath says, COVID-19 chaos has delayed the office’s actual launch. Voices is also developing a Foster Child’s Bill of Rights to propose to the General Assembly next year.
Eva Elliyoun, another of the young advocates, would like youth in foster care to receive better guidance so they can develop a plan for their adult life, whether it’s education or professional development. “Day 1, when you enter a foster home, there should be a goal set in stone,” she says. Her top legislative priority is increasing salaries for foster care workers, based on performance, which would reduce turnover and improve their ability to work with youth long-term. She’d also like to fund more positions for foster care workers, allowing for smaller caseloads.
Elliyoun entered foster care at 15 along with her younger sister. She vividly remembers the first day in her new home. “I felt lost. I felt like I had no purpose. I felt like I wasn’t good enough.” And yet, a voice inside her urged her to try. “Here — you’ve got this one chance. Make something out of yourself,” it said. And so she did.
With the encouragement of her foster parents, Elliyoun became a straight-A student and an athlete. After aging out of foster care, she was taken in by a family in Northern Virginia that has supported her educational and career goals. Parents like hers “are the reason why everyone should be inspired,” she says.
Now 21, she’s a manager at Lowe’s in Sterling. She hopes to work as an insurance agent at Progressive, then work for the federal government as a linguist.
Yet she knows her own experience doesn’t reflect reality for every other foster child in Virginia. Watching her younger sister fight every day to overcome her own trauma and make her dreams a reality, while she still has “a sparkle in her eyes,” has encouraged Elliyoun’s advocacy work. She hopes to “help her, and kids like her, and myself.”
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