Tahini-chocolate hamantaschen and chocolate-dipped dried apricots
You’ve heard of a Christmas list — naughty or nice, toys or coal — but my family has another kind of list. Starting in February, my oldest child, Byrd, compiles a list of people we know who will receive mishloach manot, the little gifts of food that Jewish families distribute during the spring holiday of Purim, this year extending from sundown March 23 until sundown March 24. We make anywhere from 20 to 30 boxes of mishloach manot each year, and it’s always a tough call to decide who will get one, hence the list.
Purim originates from an ancient story of underdog triumph with a strong female lead. Brave Esther, newly queen and secretly Jewish, prevails over evil Haman, an adviser to King Ahasuerus, who is plotting to eliminate the Jews. Jewish holidays tend to come with a lot of baggage — they’re typically a 50-50 split of celebration and sorrow — but Purim, despite the close call of near annihilation, is almost all celebration. It’s joyous, it’s raucous, and it’s kind of silly.
Festive Nutella hamantaschen with sprinkles, accompanied by finger puppets of characters from the Purim story
Consider the four mitzvot, or good deeds, that Jews are supposed to practice on Purim.
Reciting the megillah: a dramatic reenactment or “spiel” of the Purim story, the Book of Esther, aka Megillat Esther, usually performed for maximum comedic effect. Women are encouraged to take male roles and vice versa to lean into the theme of secret identities.
Eating the seudah: an open-ended feast not hemmed in by restrictions like the Passover seder, but meant to be, like the rest of Purim, purely joyous. Drinking to excess is actually recommended.
Charitable giving: carrying on the legacy of Esther and her uncle, Mordecai, by sharing with those who are less fortunate. This can be as simple as a financial donation to a nonprofit that addresses poverty in your community or a more intentional and direct act such as volunteering.
Giving gifts of food: If the best revenge is living well, then these gift baskets are another way for us to stick it to Haman (whose name we loudly “boo” whenever it’s spoken). “You didn’t defeat us, we are thriving,” they say. “Mishloach manot” in Hebrew or “shalach manos” in Yiddish, these edible gifts usually include two or more treats and can be simple or themed.
Mishloach manot with assorted hamantaschen and sesame candies
There’s a lot to love about Purim. You’ve got costumes, gender bending, making noise and getting drunk. A Halloween’s worth of trickery and revelry are expected and encouraged.
The holiday also has something else going for it: a signature cookie called hamantaschen. Although there are other Purim treats, the triangular hamantaschen (a nod to the shape of Haman’s hat) is its poster child, and it’s a cornerstone in mishloach manot, so we make dozens to enjoy and share. Giving mishloach manot makes me feel connected to something bigger than myself. It helps that the whole concept aligns with one of my favorite core values, sharing food with other people.
Proselytizing isn’t part of the typical Jewish experience. We don’t recruit new members, and famously, Jews can fall victim to a kind of “Who’s Jewish enough” jockeying that builds walls around the religion and culture. Along the same lines, not all of our holidays are super approachable. Passover has a dizzying number of stipulations. Yom Kippur involves fasting and atoning — neither are crowd-pleasers. But Purim is a holiday that’s perfect for sharing, and it gives us a sweet way to connect with our community.
Mango hamantaschen dipped in Tajín seasoning
Every year, I brainstorm an ambitious mix of fun, weird hamantaschen flavors. I’ve made PBJ-, French onion- and pickle-flavored hamantaschen, but my favorites were mango flavored with a Tajín rim. Last year, my friend, baker Keya Wingfield, brought her daughter, Uma, to whip up a batch of cross-cultural hamantaschen with my younger daughter, Hazel. We brainstormed flavors in advance, and Keya, a native of Mumbai, India, decided to feature her savory samosa filling in a starring role. It was a little of my world and a little of her world, together in a cookie that was unexpected and totally perfect.
Sometimes I worry that I’m guilty of subscribing to a pick-your-own Judaism, choosing to practice only the rituals that feel relevant to me and mostly ignoring the rest. I wonder, if I had grown up differently, would my practice be more complete, more meaningful somehow? But then I remind myself that practicing any religion is always an exercise in choice: The practitioner decides how to live with the religion they’ve chosen to accept, creating their own mishmash of traditions and pulling from them the meaning they need to find. For me, giving mishloach manot is one of those traditions that’s brimming with meaning and much-needed joy.
To enjoy hamantaschen and other Purim festivities, stop by the Purim Carnival at the Weinstein JCC, today, March 24, from noon to 3 p.m.
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