Illustration by Christiana Sandoval
This time of year can be rough. Sometimes, it’s because you’re mourning the loss of a loved one. Sometimes it’s because you’re dealing with the stress of end-of-year work deadlines. Or maybe it’s because your finances aren’t in great shape, and you’re unable to buy gifts for the people you love.
You may be unable to spend what you want to on gifts, but there are a number of ways you can get in on the giving this holiday season. That’s because there is one gift you can always give, one that is worth much more to the people in your life than a new phone, a flat screen TV or a pair of shoes.
It’s the gift of your time. Here are three ways you can give the gift of yourself while spending a little less cash this holiday season, and I love them all!
Get Cooking
I learned how to cook from my mother, and I’ve adapted recipes she passed on to me to suit my personality and my family’s taste. Nothing gives me greater joy than making a meal for my family. And while I love cooking meals year-round, cooking during the holidays feels special. The joy evident on my family members’ faces when they eat food I’ve cooked makes me feel that I’m the one who got the gift.
My wife gets in on the act, too. She makes holiday treats each year, often spending two days making all sorts of delicious desserts, from decorated sugar cookies to peanut butter balls covered in chocolate. She makes sure each bag has one of each treat — dessert diversity at its finest — and ties a ribbon around it. We give these to her coworkers and mine, our kids’ teachers, neighbors and anyone else we can think of. Based on the repeated thank-yous she gets for days beyond the initial gift giving, people truly appreciate her investment of love and time. While it’s certainly less expensive than buying gifts for 40 to 50 people, it’s also more meaningful.
Volunteer
A team I was leading at work one year came together for an employee volunteer event right before the holidays. We helped out at a local food bank by sorting and shelving donated food, cleaning and painting the facilities, and preparing bags of food to be handed out to people in need. It was fun, and we got to know each other on a deeper level as we made an impact in our community. We gave an organization trying to feed, shelter and clothe people during the holidays some desperately needed help, and we reminded ourselves of what matters most during the holidays: It’s less about shopping for gifts, and it’s more about feeling connected with others, treating one another with love and compassion.
Family
One year when I was young, my family was quite literally broke. Mom had so little money (I think she borrowed $100 from a friend) that all she could afford for my sister and me was one present each. The main dish in our Christmas dinner was turkey wings, because she couldn’t afford a whole turkey and still get what she needed for the absolutely necessary side dishes — stuffing, candied yams, green beans, mashed potatoes, and macaroni and cheese. (Trust me, the meal was absolutely delicious.) Rather than dwell on it, we packed into the car the next day and drove from New York to Burkeville, about an hour’s drive southwest of Richmond, where my mom’s aunt, uncle and cousin lived. We ate well, looked at old photographs and played in the snow for the next few days. You’d have never known that we had no money. In fact, we felt rich — we were rich — thanks to the time we gave each other, the time we spent with one another.
Don’t let being tight on funds keep you from spending time with the people you love. Have your friends and family over, or go visit them. Create some traditions together. Go see the grandparents for a couple of days. And if you can’t travel, do a staycation and make itineraries for what you can do around town with your family. Experiences shared with friends and family strengthen relationships. They become the memories you’ll talk about for holidays to come. Your gift of simply being there with them means so much more than an gift card and a “Merry Christmas” text.
My holiday wish is that you give the gift of your time to the people on your list, whether funds are tight or not. It won’t cost you much, but it’s probably the most valuable thing you have to give.